hey everyone..another post another day...i cant wait to move..i have to get out of my mothers..its driving me crazy..shes always on a rampant about my step dad..and wants to talk to me about it..but when i give my opinon she doesn't want to hear it..tells me to be quiet i dont know what i'm talking about..blah fucking blah..but anyways..the reason i wanted to post today is because of something that amuses me...i'm really getting to see the world from both views..male and female..i never realized it obviously i've never been so male in my life..but the way people...ecspecially women..react and respond to males vs females...whenever i say something reactions towards me are different..its kind of hard to explain but people approach me like they would approach a male..i never realized there was a difference...but i think its a natural habit that are embedded into people as they grow..even the way women look at me when they walk by me or pass by me..its a riot.. i never realized that women are true men bashers..haha..i constantly get reprimanded for being a man..but i love it..its a big part of being a man..you know being stupid..never doing anything right..i've always wanted to be viewed as a male..and now i am..so all those things that irritate the average man..intrigues me....i know that the more and more i change..the more and more everything around me is going to change..because right now i feel like so much has already changed..not only with me physically and mentally but with my surroundings..with other people..i dont get stared at nearly as often as i use to..so i dont feel like such a zoo animal..i rarely hear that is that a boy or a girl anymore and thats one of the best feelings ever..to finally although i'm still in between be recognized as who i am...incredible i say..chest surgery will help alot..it wont look like i have a continuous stomach..lol..but gotta get ready for work..post soon..until then...later.....

hey everyone..another day in paradise..state walked into work today..so you know what kind of day i had..it felt like it was never going to end..but on the contrary..several people kept asking if i got a hair cut or if i shaved because i looked different..and neither of those things took place..so maybe i'm glowing? haha..lol or maybe i'm just really changing physically and people are starting to notice but want to be naive and retarded about thinking its something other than my transition..i call it denial..haha..i'm getting use to it..moving in with bevan is right around the corner..i'm so excited but kind of nervous..at least at my moms i can be comfortable..over there i'll have to be a bit more reserved..which is fine..once i get my chest surgery that'll disappear..but i really think i need just that..living around another guy..being around all of his/my guy friends..i need to grow as the man i'm becoming..and i have a long way to go..but thats a perfect start..it'll open the door to manhood for me..or at least thats how i feel...its another day in the complicated yet simple life of me...jake the transguy...post soon..until then..later..

ps..new pic in the gallery..check it out!

hey everyone..another day another post..christmas is soo close..and we have around 8 inches of snow..so its looking like a white christmas..which is sweet because i haven't had one in years..i gave myself my injection yesterday by myself..nobody to monitor me doing it..i was very anxious..i got through it..i've noticed something huge...the way i'm treated now by the opposite sex..even in just a friendly way..women like to lock eyes with me often..the way they look at me is completely different now that i'm identifying as male.. its rather amusing..the way i've wanted to be treated my entire life is happening now..not later..but now..its an incredible feeling..i never knew what happiness was..i have fooled myself into thinking i was happy..but the way i feel now is a feeling never felt before..so it has been proven to me that i'm starting to become happy..i have mentioned in previous posts about an expirment i was wanting to do with my transition..if you remember it was crying.. wether men dont cry due to the actual hormones or if they dont cry due to stereotypes.. i remember i had lost the desire to cry a few weeks into starting T..when i was watching shows that i would have usually teared up on..i no longer did..well i'm going to say that it is the hormones that cause you to not cry...but its also the stereotype that feeds into it..proven to me on saturday..i was dealing with a resident passing away at my work..i felt like sitting down and crying my eyes out..but there were no tears..i couldn't figure out why..i just couldn't cry..everyone around me was crying..(mostly women) and i just couldn't..but then this morning i woke up early..and cried..in the dark while i was alone..just a quick cry..nothing huge like i had felt like doing or had done in the past..i was thinking intensely about it today..and it nearly humors me..this transition so far has become something way beyond anything i ever thought..i never realized it would physically alter everything..its amazing..i pay close attention to myself and the way i act compared to the way i feel..as in the past..its intresting..to see the world from a womans view for so many years...to now seeing the world from a mans view is nothing like i'll expierence before..i'm becoming such a compassionate man due to understanding everything...i have to keep in mind..women are from venus and men are from mars...post soon..until then...later.....

hey everyone..another day..another post...today is 15 weeks on t... my voice is getting deeper and deeper...the last week or so and i think its because of my voice i have passed everywhere i went from the kwik stop to the grocery store..its fucking amazing..i love it.. the part i dread..is when we're out and i get carded...wether its for cigarettes or alcohol...my gender is right there on my license and it can really alter things..especially when the clerk looks at it and laughs..pisses me off..but after my surgery i'm gonna get my named changed and once i do all of that in the state of kansas i'll be able to get my gender changed on all of my identification..my transition is moving along rather fast but i want it to..so i'm trying to do what i can...i'm just a trannyboy trying to make his way to manhood! post soon..until then...later....

another pic has been posted!

hey everyone..another day for another post...pats won again...14-0 baby! not alot has really been going on...just preparing myself for all the doubles i'm gonna be working start the first of the year to save up for my surgery....its gonna be a stretch but i'm willing to do it to get what i want..another change i've noticed is womens perfume..holy shit..when a woman smells good it triggers me differently then it use to..its so sexy and turns me on in a way like never before...my best friend brenda has been wearing the same perfume for the last 2 years that i've known her and the other day she sprayed it on and wow..it smelt fucking great..not in a sexual way but way in a sexual way if that makes sense...well it does in my head..i'm slowly breaking the habit of biting my nails..i have for so long to make my hands look more "rough" and manly...but now that i'm on t..i feel as if i dont need to bite my nails..been like 3 days..they're growing in fast too..my voice has really dropped too..everything happening just like it should be..its so much fun..anyways..better get..post soon until then...later......