hey everyone..another day another post..as well all know i've been bunking with a buddy of mine..well every month he has a poker night..where its just the guys...the ladies had to leave...it was just us guys..6 of us..playing poker..just being guys..it was fantastic..it felt so fucking right and perfect..it just was..i just was..a guy...thats it..guys talk about stuff that i never knew of..its amazing to see the difference between the way women socialize and the way men socialize..guys are not reserved in any way when its just the guys..anything on thier mind comes out..and they always find whatever they say funny..where as women sit back and gossip and have chit chat and stay reserved and proper..even if they aren't meaning to be proper they still are..i know that for a fact now..its fun to compare and see what the world of gender is really about...better run..post soon..until then...later....

hey everyone..another day another post..i've been super busy getting settled into my new place..its fucking awesome..i love it..so far its the choice i've made in a long time...living with another guy is fantastic..he's gonna teach me so much and doesnt' even know it..haha we're gonna buy this truck and put a new steering column in it and a rear end..i'm stoked as hell..i'm finally taking a huge step into manhood....i'm getting in great with all of his buddies and i'm pretty much stealth over here..him and his gf cyn know that i'm trans but obviously they dont share it with the world..so it works..helps me to feel more like a guy..and to finally be able to hang out with guys all the time and not just women is fucking awesome..i've never been so happy in all my life..my voice has gotten even deeper and the pores on my face seem to be bigger..i'm loosing a shit load of weight too..nearly 20lbs since i started T.. i gave myself a shot today..wasn't as nervous as i was last time..i didn't slice my finger open with the needle..that's probably a good thing..lol..the hair on my arms are coming in darker finally..longer too..a co worker at work today came up to me and said wow your hands are getting thicker and the veins are really starting to pop out..yea i love the sound of that..everything is going just right..i've been working a whole lot trying to save up for my surgery so sorry for the shortage of posts..i'll try to post more often! i wont be uploading any vids for awhile on youtube not until cyn gets her webcam hooked up..and for pics..hmm i gotta take one..i'll post it up here in a day or two..anyways better run..suppers nearly done! another day in hollywood..always someone trying to make me famous! post soon..until then..later....

hey everyone..another day another post...today is 17 weeks on T...wow..so many things have changed..in such a short amount of time..im starting to get acne...blah..kinda sucky..i look at my gallery pics and i see week 3 where i looked so different..my face was chubbier..my cheeks really..my chin was chubby..my nose eyes and eyebrows all look so different when i look at week 17 pic..really amazing..goes to show how very powerful hormones really are..and how the endocrine system in your body makes up of most of your gender.. i'm getting my gender from a bottle..wow..i sound way different too..all i have is one word... AMAZING ...i've accepted me in a whole new way..i want to go stealth and i know that but i accept the fact that i'm trans..if i had to go back and choose wether i would have been a normal female or male at birth or trans..i'd totally pick trans..its an entire new world..i'm starting to care about myself..and its different..my whole life i'd steal..cheat..say whatever i wanted do whatever i wanted..even if it was against the law..i didn't care..because i truly didnt' care about myself.. so i didn't care what i was doing to everyone around me even strangers..and i'm starting to care about myself..i can tell.. i care about others around me and i've never felt that way before...im moving in with bevan tomorrow and i'm excited..to take a step into that strict binary system..i'm going to have to adapt and really learn who i am and what i do to be a man..its trivial..complicated in its own sense and nobody gets that..but i do..and 2007 has been the best year of my life so far..i finally got to take a step in the shoes of the real me..and i like the real me...and its a never before..post soon..until then..later..

hey everyone..another day...another year...another post..happy new year..hope everyone had a great holiday! Mine was fantastic..went over to a buddy of mine house and drank the night away playing guitar hero..and got a mohawk...i gave myself another injection by myself today..but i always get so fucking nervous..i shake and my heart beats out of my chest..i dont know why..well when i went to take the cap off the needle i sliced my fucking finger..grrrrr..its okay i'll survive...my mom doesnt want me to move out until after my chest surgery...shes worried i'm going to be a victim of a hate crime..which i understand..but on the contrary..its something i need to do..i think it will be perfect to be able to observe another guy so closely..besides he knows im trans..new me before i started my transition..so its nothing new to him..and if i worry about hate crimes my whole life and never take any risks..i;ll be a fucking hermit..and im totally a risk taker..besides if it doesnt work out i know i can always move back in with my parents..my mom says i look more and more like my dad every day..which is kinda cool..hes a good looking chap..haha..its a new year..my resolution is what it has been every year...and thats to survive..but this time it means somethign different because i'm different..im looking forward to this year..for teh first time in my life...im actually excited for another year..woohoo..lol..well im exhausted..so im gonna nap for a bit..post soon...until then..later.....